Torture
by Rushi no Ryuu
Summary: A metal blade, slashing through his skin, tearing apart his flesh and piercing right through his heart. Black and blood is all he knows, and Raven. Always Raven. This contains RavenxElsword, lemons, blood and probably it's also OOC. Written for a friend.
1. Chapter 1

Torture

Elsword: RS, Raven: VC

A strangled cry escaped Elsword's mouth. His hands clenched into fists and he tried to fight the urge to scream.

"Nggh... Raven!" His eyes shot wide when the black-haired's nasod arm tore apart his flesh once more, he felt warm blood rush down his shoulders where metal blades had cut through his skin.

"Why..."

His arm wouldn't be usable for a few weeks, he had given up doing missions and dungeons long ago.

His right leg felt limp and his white trousers were soaked in his own blood, the sweet, thick, sickening smell that had been stuck on his clothes for days already and didn't want to disappear.

Raven took the Rune Slayer's face into his hand and looked him in the eyes. Those amber orbs he knew so well, they were … empty.

There was no kind of regret or sadness in them, but also no sign of something like joy. He was completely emotionless.

But his own eyes probably didn't look better. They had to be overflowing with the expression of pain and shame, and he was pretty certain he was crying right now.

Good thing he had learned to turn off his sense of pain. When the black-haired would beat him again, it would only take him a few minutes and then, he didn't feel anything anymore.

His dry throat managed to say something actually, he was quite surprised by it himself.

"Why... Raven..."

He winced slightly when a nasod fingertip of Raven's artificial arm slowly traced over his cheek, over his lips, before stopping above his eyebrow, poking the skin there painfully slow before breaking it and leaving a thin trail of blood running over Elsword's eyes.

His sight got blurry when he forgot to blink and the sticky liquid filled his lower eyelid, but it didn't make much of a difference anyway.

He could feel the small blades of the black-haired's hand run over his neck, leaving cuts and scratches at various places.

He whispered the same words over and over again.

"Why..."

Raven didn't answer. Of course. Who was he to hope for Raven to stop. Since the beginning, it had been like this – he simply had to endure it until it was over.

Elsword's feeling of time vanished completely, Raven could've beaten him up for two minutes or two hours.

It was hard to believe this bloody, cut and bruised body was his, at least he couldn't move that body one inch.

The feeling of something hitting against his already damaged skin or cutting his flesh disappeared. It seemed like the black-haired had had enough fun for today.

Carefully, not sure what to expect this time, he raised his arm against the sky, scanning it for and potentially dangerous wounds. Luckily, Raven hadn't cut anything near his vital spots, except for a few cuts over his thighs and his chest.

_What would it matter if I die now... I already feel kinda dead... _

God, he had to look so pathetic.

Raven stood there, above him, looking serious and stern as ever, the only thing destroying this aura were the red stains on his pants and shoes, as well as his blood-covered nasod arm.

Raven said something that Elsword hardly understood, but it sounded like:

"I hope you'll learn your lesson."

_Is he... speaking to me...?_

_I have no idea what he means..._

_Maybe I should just... sleep or so..._

His eyes fluttered close and he barely saw the black-haired walk away without looking back once.

He didn't see the look in the yellow eyes of his former friend and also didn't feel the blanket and the bandages being wrapped around him.

All he could think about was Raven.

HE was still running around his mind while he was drowning in a sticky, smelling darkness that occupied his senses.

**A/N: A friend has forced me to write this. Help me. Anyway, I'm sorry for Elsword, but it's for the story. Thanks for reading this, please leave a review! Also, I'm sorry because this chapter is kinda short, but well... I hope you enjoyed! **


	2. Chapter 2

Torture

**Warning: kinda lemon-ish? **

Elsword: RS, Raven: VC

Elsword pulled the bandage around his arm tighter until it cut off the blood flow in his hand. It hurt. But not as much as the wound originally did, the wound that had been caused by Raven's nasod arm slashing down into his skin.

The red-haired sighed and leaned forward. This was the first time in weeks he had the time and strength to treat his wounds.

Normally, Raven would come to him a few hours later and the ordeal would continue until he lost consciousness again, on and on, just like that, for days and nights.

He never asked the black-haired what the cause for his sudden aggression was. To be honest, he had never thought about it until now. The question had run through his mind every so often during the beatings, but he'd never given it much thought. Almost unbelievable, he'd just accepted it and didn't even complain.

That was actually a bigger question. Why didn't he tell Chung or Elesis or whoever? Why didn't he run away? Why didn't he use his own weapons when the black-haired started to break his bones and skin?

He fell backwards on his bed, losing his breath for a moment because a wound on his back broke open. With an annoyed sigh, he lifted himself up and headed to the bathroom.

While he pulled off his shirt, he looked at himself in the mirror. He looked terrible.

Bruises and cuts everywhere, one especially large one on his hipbone. That would leave a scar, definitely, just like some others, too. His wrist was still pounding with pain, it was probably twisted in some way or even broken.

He splashed some water in his face to keep his eyes from falling close and tried to reach the scratch on his lower back that bled now again.

Was he conscious enough to stand for some minutes on his own? Probably... he took the rare opportunity and stepped into the shower, letting hot water rush down his body and feeling his usually spiky hair get damp and stick to his body.

He let out a low breath. It felt surprisingly good, almost like all of the pain would be washed off his body and mind. He closed his eyes for a few seconds, but they shot open again when he almost slipped because his knees were giving up.

Seemed like he wasn't going to enjoy this shower any longer. He shivered when his skin was exposed to the cold again and wrapped a towel around his wet body.

When had this whole mess started? He barely knew anymore. All he remembered was that he'd suddenly woken up, bruised and feeling weak and Raven was hovering over his face, telling him that he had to "learn a lesson" and left.

And that was how it had started. Nothing more. Just a so-called lesson and Raven beating him up and himself not resisting for some reason.

That was it. While he was getting dressed and trying not to pass out on the spot, he asked himself countless questions, but the final conclusion was always that he... that it was his fault. If he would react, Raven would stop. Probably.

But he didn't have the guts to.

Nothing more and nothing less and he started to fear that this whole thing was going to actually kill him sooner or later because Raven only stopped when he fainted, and how would he tell the difference of being unconscious or dead?

It was nothing he was looking forward to, but he decided to finally speak to Raven about this whole thing tomorrow.

That is, if Raven wouldn't get in now and hit him again.

He was so deep in thought about their relationship that he didn't notice the door handle turning around and a well-known person stepping into his room.

He only tensed up when a stern voice spoke to him, the first time he'd heard that voice in days.

"Hey, Elsword."

He wasn't sure if he was supposed to answer Raven, so he stayed quiet until the black-haired had made his way through the room and was standing right in front of him.

Without another word, he felt strong hands at his shoulders and winced slightly because they were gripping exactly on a large bruise at his collarbone.

The next thing he knew was that Raven was hovering over his face and he'd been thrown onto the bed. It was actually not bad in comparison to what Raven would usually do, but he was worried about the black-haired. He definitely had something in mind right now.

But to be honest, he wasn't really bothered. He wasn't even scared anymore. He felt just... empty.

Empty because he had no idea what Raven thought at this moment.

He had absolutely no idea what this was all about, and that was new. Usually, he could see through Raven like through glass, he'd always known what the black-haired was thinking and could predict his actions. It made them flawless partners in battles, but also great friends. But now... he couldn't sense even the slightest indication of the other's intentions. He would have to simply wait or react now.

The latter seemed better right now, because the position they were in... he didn't particularly like it. It was kind of embarrassing, and it made him feel weak. Not like that would be something new by now, but it was another kind of weak. It was a feeling that he'd never felt before, someone being so dominant over him and especially a friend. Well, former friend. Were they still friends? He had no idea. Probably not.

For some reason, that thought made him sad.

His thoughts stopped spinning when Raven finally made a move. Well, it wasn't exactly a move, it was more like a sign to what he would be trying next. And what that move was – Elsword didn't like it one bit.

Raven moved his hand under Elsword's shirt.

And along with this motion, he heard him say something. Something that made his eyes widen and his cheeks heat up, but filled him with fear at the same time.

"I found another torture method for you..."

He had the feeling that his brain wasn't working at all right now. All he knew was that he was scared, scared and kind of angry. Why he was scared – well, that was obvious. Why he was angry … maybe because no matter how hard his mind raged against him, no matter how often he told himself that he had to get up or slap Raven or kick him or at least say something, his body didn't react. It was like his physical form was completely giving in and accepting the black-haired's actions. It terrified him, because he'd never been the kind of person who gave up easily, and, on top of that, this was Raven.

The guy that had beaten him up for the last three months, the guy he'd fought so many times and never won – it was true. They'd probably battled a thousand times, yet it would always end in Elsword being tired and panting on the ground and Raven walking away wordlessly, maybe because he didn't know what to say after he'd won against his friend and fighting partner.

And now, this felt like another battle, a battle his mind was more than willing to take, but his body wouldn't obey. His legs wouldn't move, even his mouth was resisting.

And then, it started.

He felt the palm of the black-haired's hand under his shirt, moving up his chest, eventually pulling the piece of fabric off his body. He saw it being tossed into the corner of his room and felt a cool breeze of air on his bare chest.

He had no idea what that meant. He wanted to scream up at Raven, wanted to ask what he was up to, wanted to break this heavy silence between them.

It was like Raven could read his thoughts. His amber eyes found Elsword's own, and they locked, and didn't move from there on. They looked into each other's eyes the whole time, Elsword felt like Raven could tell what he was thinking. And eventually, he answered Elsword's unspoken question.

"The biggest torture for a human is to take his dignity, right?"

The red-haired completely lost it there. Was Raven... going to do... what he thought he would do now? He really hoped that he was wrong and that his mind was just misinterpreting things. But it seemed like he was right, after all, when Raven's strong fingers locked with his waistband, slowly pulling it down a little bit, exposing his hipbones.

He bit his lip, trying not to scream now, because he was afraid it would be just a squeak coming out of his dry throat.

Raven, on the other hand, didn't say or do anything else. He was like in his own little world now, all focusing on Elsword's... ahem, pants.

There was another tug at his waistband and soon his clothes flew off, and he was left completely naked. It was scary, it was embarrassing, it made him feel weak and terribly uneasy. He tried to control his breathing to stay in control of his own thoughts, but he failed terribly. Raven hadn't really done anything besides taking his clothes off, but in the matter of a few minutes, Elsword was a panting, blushing, squirming mess. He told himself he needed to stop, or Raven would go even further. Where that "further" was, he didn't want to imagine it.

They still kept eye contact, and maybe that was the worst thing of all. Raven broke it as soon as the red-haired squeezed his crimson orbs shut, creating a wall between his scared and yet excited self.

While he wasn't looking and floating around in darkness, he could feel the other's gaze wandering all over him. It was like a ray of sunlight that touched his skin, he didn't see it, but it made his body heat up where it just lay.

Raven was still doing nothing. Only pinning his wrists down so that he couldn't run away, but the red-haired strongly doubted he would have strength to do this now. In fact, he doubted that his mind would even register the possibility of getting away and he would just stay here like that, even if Raven decided to disappear.

Speaking of disappear. He felt the black-haired's fingers loosen up around his wrists, the slight pain vanishing there and he slowly broke open one eyelid, barely seeing the other.

Was he walking away? No. He had just let go of his hands, but that was enough. Now he would get up and find some kind of clothing somewhere and then disappear and never come back to Raven.

Ouch. Something tugged at his chest, a stinging, numbing pain. It wasn't that strong, but it overtook his whole body.

His mind gave the signal to stand up, and he mentally sighed when his body still didn't react. That couldn't be! He should get up and run away, right now. Yet, it was like his body knew better and was being stubborn for some reason.

He unintentionally locked eyes with Raven again. God, those eyes would kill him someday, straightforward piercing into his mind and soul.

He felt that gaze wander over him again, scanning every centimeter of his body, excluding nothing. Nothing.

Blood was running wild in his body, flooding his very being, making the wounds throb in pain and then concentrated on two places.

His cheeks, and... oh god, he wanted to die. Why. Why. Why now, why here, why this? Questioning himself didn't help, and slapping himself mentally also had no effect.

But he knew what made it worse. Raven, intensely staring down. Like his eyes were burning his skin and making him squirm and shudder.

A little drop of salty water was running down his cheek, but it didn't help him cool down one bit. Instead, the heat spread even to his eyes, the view in front of him was blurring and his mind, too.

It was so hazy, he didn't even know what was happening, why Raven didn't react, why he didn't react, why they just stared at each other, said nothing and he was slowly losing it.

Raven stood up and left, but his body was still paralyzed, like he was petrified. His skin still felt hot like fire, everywhere, and he didn't even bother pulling the blanket above him.

He was suddenly very tired... his eyes fluttered close and tears were still wetting the pillow when he sunk into a squirming, unstable slumber with questionable dreams.

Raven had really broken him this time.


	3. Chapter 3

Torture

**WARNING: LEMON IN THIS CHAPTER**

Elsword: RS, Raven: VC

Raven was gone.

That was the first thing he noticed when his eyes opened again. It was a good sign, he guessed, his body was still weak and strangely shuddering whenever he thought about the black-haired, but he actually found the energy to stand up, walk a few meters, gulp down a glass of water and take a pill against the throbbing headache.

To be honest, he had no idea why he felt so bad. Raven hadn't done anything to him this time, he had only – his knees were almost giving in when the memories flashed in front of his inner eye again – undressed him and everything else was completely his own fault.

His fault for getting so strangely excited when Raven's eyes wandered over his body, his fault for... god, he didn't want to remember.

Elsword took a deep breath and turned his gaze sidewards, to the bed, where... his hands clenched into fists and the heat was running through his body again.

His fingers touched the sheets hesitatingly, and he couldn't help but imagine.

Imagine himself being pinned down by Raven again, imagine Raven doing... ugh.

With a groan, his body fell forward onto the bed, burying his face in the pillow, he could smell sweat and the scent of the pillow and something else, and he wanted to shoot himself, but his fingers acted on their own, pulling the sheets closer to his face to soak up the smell that he hadn't noticed all this time before – it was Raven's scent.

It was dark and a faint hint of blood was there, but unmistakeably, his sheets smelled like Raven.

This was bad. His cheeks were flushing again and a by-now familiar feeling spread began to pool in his stomach, telling him that he either had to let go and wash the sheets now, or something would happen that he definitely didn't want to experience.

Why was this happening? Why was he getting so excited and a tickling, shuddering sensation overtook his body when he thought of Raven?

Raven...

Elsword wanted to cry, it was so embarrassing and yet so addicting, imagining Raven and himself, soaking up the smell of the black-haired, thinking of him, remembering the burning sensation on his skin he felt when Raven had touched him there, even his wounds reminded him of that body, that gaze, those eyes, this...

He shook his head and threw the sheets away, away in the corner of his room, trying to shut Raven out of his thoughts, but it didn't work.

He had no idea how he was supposed to deal with this.

If he didn't think of something else soon, very soon, he knew that he would be lost.

Lost in thoughts, in feelings, in memories of only yesterday, that he hated and loved at the same time, he wanted Raven to never come back again and yet he missed him so much it hurt, he hated him for what he had done, but couldn't help to replay all the actions in his head over and over again, until his body told him with an unmistakeable … _signal _that it was enough already and he should be thinking of something else.

It didn't work.

He tried to think of everything he knew besides Raven, but apparently, that wasn't much, and as soon as he concentrated on the heat in his body again, there were images running through his mind, things he never knew he could imagine.

His hand moved on its own accord, he couldn't stop it, and it took him only a few seconds to be completely lost in the burning sensation.

His mouth fell open and he knew he was probably moaning and gasping all over and he was very happy that this room was almost soundproof.

Elsword was a blushing, squirming, shuddering mess by now, he was lying on his bed in a fetal position, facing the wall, his hand moving on its own.

The heat in the room was almost unbearable by now, he thought he was going to melt on the spot, and during all this time, images of Raven ran through his mind that he couldn't stop and it sent shivers down his spine, making his fingers move faster, quicker, he felt his eyes becoming wet and then-

"R-Raven..."

This was it. He hadn't actually done that, right? He didn't just _moan his name_ while doing... this.

He hoped it was all a dream, wanted the feeling to disappear, and yet it sent shudders and shivers and a wonderful feeling through his body that was addicting and shut out the rest of the world.

The door creaked open, and he wanted to pull the blanket over his body, but it lay crumbled on the other side of the room, because it smelled like Raven – this thought made a familiar heat collect in his stomach and it was just _so damn good_ that he couldn't stop now.

Footsteps were coming near him, but he couldn't bring his hand to move upwards, couldn't fight the redness on his face.

"Elsword..."

A warm, moist breath tickled his ear, his name being whispered in such a naughty voice made his breath stop and he gasped, his heartbeat so fast that it felt like it would crush his chest.

"My, my... you miss me so much?"

He knew that voice. This dark, low, sultry voice that was dripping with desire and he wanted to hear more, more, until he died from this feeling, until he melted right here.

His eyes shut themselves, blocking out everything except for a finger trailing down his neck, his collarbones, his bare chest and he thought he was going to die when they stopped, only centimeters away from where he wanted them to touch, he bit his hand to hold back a moan and finally, finally, there were strong fingers, touching him and it suddenly felt like they were everywhere, overtaking his mind and body, and he couldn't say that he disliked it.

It didn't take him long.

Only the feeling of Raven's breath on his ear would've probably been enough, but feeling him actually touching him there, it was too much.

His eyes shot open but he saw nothing but white, a blinding white that made his eyes teary and his body moved against Raven's hand, still not getting enough, it was never enough, but suddenly that hand was wet and slick and he knew why, and it made him want to disappear.

Of course, his wish wasn't granted, instead, he felt Raven's chest press into his back, arms wrapping around his torso, keeping him in this world and preventing him from losing himself one more time, he felt Raven shiver behind him and wondered what the black-haired was thinking now.

He never figured it out.

It was so dark and so warm and it felt good to be intertwined with someone else's body, even if it was Raven, or maybe just because it was Raven, he let his eyes slip close and welcomed the darkness of a deep sleep, not hearing anymore what Raven was whispering in his ear.

It didn't really matter though. He was here, and Raven was, too, and that was enough for the moment.


	4. Chapter 4

Torture

Elsword: RS, Raven: VC

It was strange. Elsword was having weird dreams about the black-haired lately, but now, when he had just woken up next to him, remembering the events of the previous night, there was nothing negative floating around in the atmosphere, just a warm, fuzzy, safe feeling.

Elsword didn't dare to open his eyes, afraid to break the magic around them, but also because what he was feeling was enough for the moment and it took him a few seconds to handle his emotions as well. He smiled a little, for the first time in weeks probably.

It didn't matter that he didn't wear any clothes, it didn't matter that he recalled doing the most embarrassing thing possible right in front of Raven, Raven, whose hands had broken his body and soul for the last few weeks, Raven, who was now hugging him from behind, his own back pressing into the black-haired's chest, their legs intertwined, Raven's arm loosely hanging over Elsword's shoulder, their hands gently lying besides each other, their fingers almost touching.

It was like the red-haired was caught up in a warm and comfortable and protecting shell made of Raven, made of his body, his smell, long, black hair flowing over their backs, smooth skin touching, creating both a physical connection and an atmosphere that was lingering with emotion.

For several minutes, Elsword enjoyed the warmth and the comfort and the belief that everything was alright now, that they were friends again, or even more, that they would just go on like nothing happened, that his woulds would heal just as his mind and Raven would forgive him and he would forgive Raven and the world was okay again.

Some time passed like this, when suddenly a thought ran through Elsword's mind, something he'd thought quite a few times in the past days, something that he didn't really want to think, although he couldn't sense anything wrong with it.

It was the wish to see Raven's face, watch him, know him again, the wish to understand what the black-haired thought of.

He shifted carefully, slowly, aware that Raven might wake up every second. When he was facing the black-haired, he could feel the other's steady breath on his face. A soft blow every few seconds on his eyelids that calmed him down, he saw Raven's eyes closed and relaxed and the mouth that was usually not looking very nice, slightly agape and his lips looked so damn tempting.

He didn't really know what had gotten into him when he leaned towards Raven, inching closer and closer, closing the gap between their faces, all while raising a hand towards the black hair, caressing it and playing with a few strands.

The Rune Slayer's eyes slipped close and it was just half an inch separating their mouths, when suddenly, the other shifted in his sleep.

His mind went completely nuts when a by-now very familiar voice rung in his ears, immediately setting a fire on his cheeks and letting his body retreat within seconds.

"Els...?"

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. What was he supposed to do now? He had to do something, had to explain it somehow or cover up his intentions of... he swallowed … _kissing Raven. _Quick, quick, think of something, but his mind didn't work like it should work and he couldn't think of anything.

This was the worst that could've happened. He was sitting here, naked, with his enemy/friend/lover? in front of him, who he just tried to kiss in his sleep, and he woke up and wanted an explanation. And, if that wouldn't have been enough, his face was getting a nice shade of red.

"E-Eh..."

As if that would be enough to explain this. He wanted to facepalm, but his body couldn't bring out anything, not an action, much less proper words.

"What... what are you... huh?"

Ugh. Elsword would have to remember this, the day he found his friend cute. But seriously, Raven was rubbing the sleep off of his eyes, he was – like Elsword noticed now – also just wearing boxershorts, which made the Rune Slayer blush even more, and there was even a faint hint of a blush spreading across the black-haired's cheeks.

Wait a moment. Raven was blushing?

Indeed, he was. Elsword smiled, although it didn't really help the embarrassing situation he was in, it really made it worse, because the look of confusion on Raven's face didn't disappear, it was actually doing the opposite.

"What... that... are you... I..." It seemed that Elsword at least wasn't the only one having problems to find proper words and the obvious look of embarrassment on his friend's (?) face made Elsword chuckle.

"What are you laughing about?!" Raven firmly gripped Elsword's naked shoulders, shaking him a little, but now so much that anyone would think he was serious about it. It was a friendly, teasing way, something that you did with – without knowing it actually, Elsword's heart skipped a beat or maybe two and he swallowed – something that you did with _friend. _

"Elsword? Are you alright?" A worried look flew across the black-haired's face the second he looked into Elsword's crimson orbs, it was easy to tell that his friend was on the verge of crying. Raven was almost panicking. Had he done anything wrong just now? He almost laughed. He'd done so many things wrong in the last months, he couldn't even count them, yet, here he was, like he was expecting Elsword to forgive him.

He'd had his reasons to do those things, of course. But if those reasons were good reasons, that was a whole different question. He almost wanted to join his friend with crying, if he had still the privilege to call Elsword a friend, so guilty, so worthless, so wrong was he.

He'd been wrong, but a look into those shining eyes, a touch with this flawless skin – or, thanks to him, not so flawless anymore – would always set his mind at ease, it made him feel safe and at home.

His attention focused back on the red-haired, who was shivering under his touch, probably also because it was freaking cold in the room.

Raven didn't say a word, he lowered his gaze and grabbed a blanket from besides him, covering the two shivering bodies in it, making their skin touch for the umpteenth time this morning and sending a little blush on his cheeks. Hopefully Elsword wouldn't notice.

Said Rune Slayer was seemingly busy with his own business, he was playing with the edge of the blanket and his ponytails, chewing on his lip and his face told anybody that he was extremely nervous right now.

He had a point there.

Maybe it was better to leave him alone now, but that was just when the red-haired's mouth opened and he started to speak.

"Raven... about... this."

Raven swallowed and his eyes filled with tears.

"I... I want to talk to you about this. As much as I would want to, we can't leave it just like that, and I'm sure you understand what I mean. All I want is an explanation from you."

Raven cleared his throat and blinked several times to conceal the fact that he was near an emotional breakdown.

"I... I know. You know, Elsword... I can't really explain this to you. I," his voice cracked and he was getting quieter and quieter up to the point where he wasn't sure if Elsword could hear him anymore, "I need you to know that this is a part of me I always hated. A part of me would get what I want, no matter how, no matter what, I know no borders and no taboos then. I hate it, but I can't stop it. And..."

Elsword tilted his head. This was different from what he had expected. To be honest, he was ready for something along the lines _I hate you _or _I can't forgive you_. And now, he was getting _I hate myself_? That was a little strange, especially if he knew that Raven meant it. He knew his friend well enough by now to be able to tell that he was serious about this.

Raven raised his voice.

"And... I want you to understand! I want you to know what is going on here! I-I want you to realize your own feelings!"

Several seconds of silence lingered between them before Raven continued, almost shouting now.

"Accept it already! You are in love with me! I know it, I've known it for a long time! I may sound selfish now, but it's so obvious! And I want you to realize this, because..."

His voice died down as if his brain had gone on autopilot and he was about to say something that shouldn't be voiced out loud. Raven was panting, shivering, blushing, clenching his fists, all at the same time and it was obvious, even to persons who didn't know him, that he was having an extreme emotional breakdown right now.

But only someone who knew him as well as Elsword could know what he needed now.

His arms moved on their own accord when they pulled the black-haired into a tight hug, skin against skin, breath against breath, heart against heart.

Almost, just barely, he felt his breath hitch and could sense the sound of Raven's heart bumping violently against his own chest, a faint wetness spreading on his shoulder and running down his back when his friend wasn't able to stand the pressure any longer.

Elsword was rubbing Raven's back, whispering sweet nothings in his ear, played with the black hair because he knew that was good for Raven now, trying to calm him down, trying to get his mind back to earth and it worked.

It always worked.

While he did that, Elsword's mind was running a mile per second. _I love Raven. Raven knows. He wants me to realize. That's why he tortured me. He is sorry. He is sorry. I love Raven. That's why he tortured me. I love Raven. He knows. I know. Wait. _

When they separated from each other, which was a little awkward, it just had to happen. Their eyes met and once they were locked, neither of them could find the courage or the will to break the contact.

In Raven's eyes there was a look Elsword had never seen before. It was soft and caring, and as they continued to stare into each other's eyes, there lit a kind of spark between them, it grew bigger until it lit a fire in their bodies and they both didn't know what to say. It was a heavy atmosphere, but for some reason, it didn't feel bad. "Raven..." The black-haired didn't answer.

It was like someone had suddenly opened their hearts. Suddenly, Elsword understood everything. The torture had been Raven's desperate and twisted way of telling Elsword that he was aware of Elsword's feelings for him, and that he returned them. It had been, as strange as it sounded at that moment, for his own good, for their own good.

At the same time, Elsword's eyes suddenly held a softness and happiness that could only mean one thing. He had realized, finally, after days and weeks and months of torture that had physically tortured Elsword and mentally hurt Raven, after a hundred times of checking if Elsword was really okay when he was already unconscious, after a thousand little heart attacks when he thought he'd hit a vital spot or his face or something, after a million cries from Elsword, begging him to stop and to let go, and a million silent tears from Raven, telling him that he didn't want to do this.

Neither of them spoke what they were thinking, neither of them felt the need to express his feelings when they were so obvious by now, neither of them complained when fingers entangled in black and red hair, when hands roamed over naked torsos, when tears were finally released and immediately wiped away, when hungry lips, full of despair and worry and the want to be forgiven and heavy with a ton of unreleased feelings met again and again, never getting enough, always coming back for more.

It was weird, it was twisted, it hurt, it was desperate, it was painful, hard to accept and even harder to believe, maybe even impossible in some kind of way.

It was torture.

But it was also love.


End file.
